Loddar’s Little Lecture: Job application

Hello Bavarians,
It’s me, Loddar! :-)
In reference to the latest newspaper articles, I draw the conclusion that you have a job for me – passing to me like the fist to an eye?
And to say it even clearer: You are the fist and I am the eye. Wonderful, or?
As a big admirerer of Uli I am very shocked on the one side, but on the other side I am really beghostered, that he is sacked. Because this is exactly the job I am born for! Yes, I am the born leader!
Me, Loddar, the new Bavarian President! Doesn’t it sound wonderful! Yes!
Okay, because I have some capacities free, I could start tomorrow, perhaps today, perhaps in the next five seconds or better: Now!

Qualifications:
– My name: Loddar, this is qualification enough.
But I have even more!
– My famous Belt-Shoe-Theory, comparable to Aristotelian Philosophy: The belt must fit the shoes and the other way round.
– Language knowledges: Fluently Germany, English, France, Great Britannian and Russia, Athiopian Dialects, Serbo-kroatian Slangs and: Esperanto
– Football
– My famous Internet Lecture
– Excel. I can Excel.
– And Word.
– I can Google. Very good. And very fast.
– And some other difficult computer stuff like power point. Which is very rare.
– I have a XING page, a facebook account, I am on twitter and on google plus.
– Brillant appearance, 55 exwomens, smashing looking good.
– Driving license.

Okay, let’s do it!
Make a cross in the right castle and send it back to me!
Yes, you are the next Bavarian president ( )
No, Obama will be the next Bavarian president ( )

See you soon,
Yours Loddar

Über Liv Maxx

I love Writing.
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34 Antworten zu Loddar’s Little Lecture: Job application

  1. Creamy schreibt:

    Loddar, hope you are very lucky with your new job!

  2. Anna Nuehm schreibt:

    Thanks, mate. But they didn’t answer so far.
    Can itself handle just a few seconds!
    But I recieved some really good offers from firms out of the IT-sector.
    I’m an IT-specialist and: I didn’t know that before.

    Unbelievable, how qualified I am.
    Love it!

  3. Anna Nuehm schreibt:

    Kaiman? Have some shoes in Kaiman. Love them. Really good quality.
    Should buy another pair of it, you are absolutely right, mate!

  4. Anna Nuehm schreibt:

    lautleise, I would never do that! Never ever talk about my shoes in such a way!
    Eating soup out of my lovelings shoes, man?! Are you crazy?!
    You must be absolutely nuts!
    This is a crime!
    I am SHOCKED!!
    I drank whiskey out of Pamelas bra! This is the way the world goes round, mate!
    Have a nice day, mate! :-)
    Loddar

  5. Anna Nuehm schreibt:

    Who is Anna? ah, I remember: Exwomen number 12, 27, 45 and 52 has called Anna.
    Thanks, must send them flowers…

    Uli in the kitchen? Is he now a fucking TV-Cook, too?
    Hate all this kitchen-shows!
    Ugly people standing in a grubby kitchen, cooking things that nobody knows.
    And the worsest of all is this Johnny Oliver!
    Building an Atomic bomb is easier than cooking his recipies!
    Such an idiot!
    Greetings
    Loddar

  6. Anna Nuehm schreibt:

    Kitchen or Kittschen – it’s a place a real man never should set his foot in!
    Real Mans don’t cook!
    They let cook. So easy is it.

  7. Anna Nuehm schreibt:

    A cooking Man! Good joke. :-)
    Very funny. Love it!
    A man standing in the kitchen and – cooking…
    *prchrhcrhchr… muahaha.. made my day!
    Love this joke.

  8. Creamy schreibt:

    I absolutely tune up with Loddar. A cooking man is a funny joke.

    Lautleise, you know how many times they thought I’m a kitchen lady. Isn’t it true or not?

  9. Anna Nuehm schreibt:

    lautleise, stopp it, This joke kills me!
    I am crying tears of laughter! *MUAHHAHAHA
    A man who cooks…. unbelievable!

    Creamy, a cooking man… its like a man dancing around with pink tights…

    I never cooked in my holy life! Not even water! Cooking is for womens!
    Women cook, man eat. Simplicity of life.
    Yours Loddar

  10. Creamy schreibt:

    Like in the good old times, when we where sitting around the fire in caves.

  11. Creamy schreibt:

    The time when Uli was born.

  12. Anna Nuehm schreibt:

    Yes. Exactly. Times have not changed since then. Luckily.
    Men are hunting, playing football .
    Women cook and look good. Thats life!
    Cooking men are unnatural. Against the laws of nature.
    Men don’t fly, men don’t cook.

    Loddar

  13. Creamy schreibt:

    Lautleise, you are wrong again, I don’t drink quartely, I drink daily, but not a Quarterly. You know I’m a man and drink stronger drinks.

    Like Loddar, he has always a hard drink in his hand and in the other hand he has a girl…and so nice girls from all over the world. He’s a handsome guy and has a punch by the women. And he is so much studied that he is able to speak so many languages. GREAT!

  14. Anna Nuehm schreibt:

    Creamy, is that true, you are a Meerrettich man, cooking soft boiled eggs?
    Man, I lose my faith in Mankind!
    But reading the last part of your comment: I am really beghostered!
    That’s my man! Let’s drink together!

    To tell the truth: I learned this all in self-education. Hard way, but leading to success.

    My punch is my secret weapon! :-) :-)

  15. Creamy schreibt:

    A secret weapon is always a good thing.

  16. Creamy schreibt:

    Loddar, soft boiled eggs are not so much easy and I haven’t so much success till now. I can cook and cook and it’s getting harder and harder instead to be softer. And there is alsways a crispy skin around. This is down crushing.

  17. Creamy schreibt:

    Is Bob the Erfounder of the famous motorcycles?

    Yes I know, Easy Rider and so….

  18. Anna Nuehm schreibt:

    Hi Everybodies: :-)
    Soft boiled eggs, hard boiled eggs – these are the real mysteries of Mankind!
    It’s a bit like this E=mc-Stuff!
    I don’t care about that. I care about football and my sexiness. This must be enough.

    I once cooked water – the hotel room was devastated..
    Cost me 2000 Dollar. And my marriage number 44. Never again, mates, never again!

    Lautleise, you with a chicken?! Oh my god… have a holy cinema in my head..

    Yours Loddar

  19. Creamy schreibt:

    Loddar, yesterday I had a look on you in the Farview or also known as TV.

    You look so happy and your future wife 56 seems to be more nicer than the others. But let me tell, I liked Liliana most, have something left for girls from Ukraine or Whiterussia.

  20. Anna Nuehm schreibt:

    I looked so happy because I discovered the new hair fluid in Douglas, which makes my hair so soft and so shiny – love it!
    I looked also so happy, because I met my women number 57: the Douglas girl. She is the love of my life! I know it.

    Good taste, Creamy, Liliana, I liked her most, too. Like Jolanda, Esperanza, Sauselita, Lorenzia, Estefania, Juanita, Olga, Tanja, Tanita, Tabita, Joelina, Esther, Esperanza, Nadeshda, Judith, Mary, Cynthia, Lolita, Kim, Perdita, Anastasija
    Alexandra, Irina, Galina, Galitera, Günther, Gülcan, Shennur, Anita,…
    And all the rest! I love them all most!
    Great womens!

  21. Anna Nuehm schreibt:

    lautleise, breaking my head would not be so bad, but breaking my hairstyle – this would kill me!
    Can’t even sink about it! Horrendous!

    A crispy chicken: Women nr 27 was a girl from Malibu. Spent the holy day in the sun… Man, she looked like 32, and she was 22! Too old for me…

  22. Creamy schreibt:

    Loddar, I know you are not allowed to talk about used products and to do commercials, but hopefully you don’t use the products the other famous trainer is using. You know who I’m talking about. The ugly guy who has your job. The Bundestrainer!

  23. Creamy schreibt:

    Don’t make me scary!

  24. Anna Nuehm schreibt:

    Welcome, lauti, I always sink when I am sinking..

    Creamy, this makes me scary, too!
    No no, the only sing we have in common is the chair he is sitting on.
    Will be my chair. Very soon.
    Will kick his ass out! On the nice way, but kick it out.

  25. Creamy schreibt:

    You are my hero! In all….hair, girls, toes and because of the very imbortand Belt-Shoe-Theory.

  26. Anna Nuehm schreibt:

    I am your hero? Thats really not very surprising, dear Creamy.
    I am used to be admired.
    But I still love it. :-)
    Want an autograph?
    Here: From Loddar to Creamy, my dear Internet-Friend, whose idol I am.
    Perpaps, some day you can step into my footsteps und become such a great womanizer, too.
    Yours Loddar
    ps: Stop cooking, this is so unsexy! Stop it, this is an order, not a proposition!
    Best wishes, Loddar ♥

  27. Creamy schreibt:

    In past I was sinking it’s because of your money, but it’s because of your charme. You’re such a womanizer. GREAT!

  28. Anna Nuehm schreibt:

    Creamy, you can become the first president of my holy fan-club… I think you would fit perfectly.

    lautleise, if God had intended that Mans cook, he would give them fryingpans instead of hands, an he invented the kitchen aid for Mens and not the football!
    But you can cook as much as you want – means more womens for me and Creamy!
    :-)

    Yours Loddar

  29. Creamy schreibt:

    Loddar, have you seen the 22 men on the green yesterday. Great guy from Polandia.

    Like you in good old times. Of course you are not polish and never played in yellow dress, but you was a famous soccer player and now you are a great trainer. Why you can’t come to bavaria instead of the Paela-Eater Guardiola.

    We all have seen what happend with spanisch football.

  30. Anna Nuehm schreibt:

    Creamy, nobody is like me! Besides of me, capisce?! No one can imitate my great sackes allover the holy world.
    Of sure I saw this. Was really nice these four goals. Not bad, really.
    Five would have been better, but four is okay. Not excellent, but okay.

    But I fully agree, that I would be the right trainer. Trainer-President in personal union.
    A bit like God, only the holy Ghosts lacks.

    Spaniards are losers! Football, snooker or Poker. So worse players. I’ve never seen so bad players. Especially on online Poker.

    Lautleise, Cucumber-troup is the right word. Don’t hesitate to ask for my advice in all language affairs. I am specialist, you know?!

    Have all a good day! And good appetite, if you eat laterly!
    Loddar

  31. Creamy schreibt:

    Loddar, don’t forget Tennis!

  32. Anna Nuehm schreibt:

    Lautleise, real sportsmen don’t drink! Never! Fränz never dränk! Oliver never dränked, me never dränks. Clear?

    Creamy, we talked about serious sports.. Tennis is for old ladies!

  33. Anna Nuehm schreibt:

    What? I dont wear a bra! Are you nuts, man?
    Think you are cooking too hot stuff!
    Man, man, man!
    I would not touch Miss Effenhill with a pincers, which means Kneifzange in your dialect.
    She is older than my mother!

  34. Anna Nuehm schreibt:

    I dont douch! I am not a warm doucher, you know?
    I only order hotelrooms with floating ice cold waterfalls in it.
    I always douch cold.
    But thanks for your help, mate. :-)
    yours Loddar

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